Songs of all kinds end up speaking to me in a lot of different ways. Some songs I hear just make me want to dance, especially if I'm at a wedding. Others make me cry because of sentimental reasons. "California girls" by Katy Perry makes me think of randomly spending an evening in Chicago with Renee. The "Untitled hymn" often brings me to tears and also remember it being sung at my sister's wedding. "The Middle" by Bleed American brings me all the way back to my first discman and cd bought by my bro Tim when I was 13.
Lady Gaga's new single "Born this way" resonates with me in a special way because she sings about accepting what we were born with and bringing it to the table as a good thing. It's my new theme song in so many ways.
Most of you know that I love to joke about being in a wheelchair especially around people who don't knew me. One the latest additions is "being head over wheels in love."
I need reminders like this (and it's coming from a pop star) that we have to accept what we have/are born with as reality. Some days I want to kick my wheelchair because I hate using it. Sometimes I want to just walk to the bathroom. Sometimes I wish I could go into an interview without my wheels. These are frustrations that I don't like to verbalize, yet I'm putting out there on my blog?
Well, let's not forget the words of Lady Gaga:
Don't be drag, just be a queen
Whether you're broke or evergreen
You're black, white, beige, chola descent
You're lebanese, you're orient
Whether life's disabilities
Left you outcast, bullied or teased
Rejoice and love yourself today
'Cause baby, you were born this way
My nephew Isaiah (aka Zae) and I
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Odd Jobs :)
I'm pretty sure I don't know how to just sit around (Ironic, isn't it?). In college, I was constantly involved in groups, events, what-have-you. Actually this started at a young age when I was involved as a Jr. Naturalist for my backyard Nature Center, involved in 4H, church events, and writing my own newspaper called Bekah's Babble. This past summer, after graduating from TIU I had an internship with Advocate Healthcare for 20 hours a week. This internship didn't start until June so I had two weeks to rest up from college craziness. That resting lasted a weekend plus two days. I started working on the campaign full time and then that moved to part time when my internship came up. I worked the campaign until it was over. Ok, this was the time to look for a job which became my full time job and in a way it still is.
Because it is hard to find a job right now, this search has taken longer than expected. But despite the lack of a full time position, I still am working odd jobs - any and all that I can pick up. I tutor, shred documents, copy edit resumes, work with my dad, and sell lemonade. Ok, the selling lemonade hasn't happened yet. But seriously I try to do every possible thing I can to keep busy.
So do you have any odd jobs that you need help with liken shredding that box of old documents, sprucing up that resume or cover letter, tutoring your child, or someone to mix that lemonade concentrate? Well, I'm available and pretty flexible!! Give me a call, text, email, tweet, facebook comment, smoke signals, etc.! I would love to help you or your friends out! :D
Because it is hard to find a job right now, this search has taken longer than expected. But despite the lack of a full time position, I still am working odd jobs - any and all that I can pick up. I tutor, shred documents, copy edit resumes, work with my dad, and sell lemonade. Ok, the selling lemonade hasn't happened yet. But seriously I try to do every possible thing I can to keep busy.
So do you have any odd jobs that you need help with liken shredding that box of old documents, sprucing up that resume or cover letter, tutoring your child, or someone to mix that lemonade concentrate? Well, I'm available and pretty flexible!! Give me a call, text, email, tweet, facebook comment, smoke signals, etc.! I would love to help you or your friends out! :D
Monday, February 21, 2011
Surrender
I am stubborn. This is seen in so many ways, good and bad. Tonight I was having stomach cramps and my mom offered me some liquorice. I refused several times because I once took it for my stomach which resulted in me throwing it up seconds later. If you know me well, you know that I despise vomiting more than being sick for days. I told a friend that I have a "stomach made of steel" because I refuse to vomit unless incredibly necessary.
Another example of my stubbornness was last night. I was over in the Wheaton College area with Jacob. We were going to go up to a friend's apartment to watch a movie but two flights of stairs stood in my way. Even though there was probably 5 or 6 strong men around to life me up these stairs, I decided to crawl. Jacob reassured me over and over that I should let them carry me up but I continued in my ways and told him that I would rather crawl then fall.
If I have an opinion over something, I am stubborn to maintain that I am right. In the second grade, I was learning about the body and its systems. I learned the sternum protects the heart and rib area. I told this fact to my older brother Tim who made the claim that I wasn't right. I fought with him and found a credible source who backed up my argument. I still celebrate this victory.
This stubbornness sometimes has the problem of getting me in trouble, making me eat some humble pie, and even reevaluate my choices. The stubbornness that I have is because I want to maintain control of my life. I am stubborn that I think know what is best for me rather than giving control to God.
Surrender your life. This is not an easy task to do when I want to be in control. I've had to do it several times but not without some kicking and screaming along the way. Surrender your strength because I need to show others that in your weaknesses, I AM stronger. Surrender your comfort because I have better things for you during this change. Surrender it all to me because I said so. Sometimes we receive answers of why God asks us to surrender. Other times we have no clue.
God is teaching me this lesson of surrendering everything to Him yet again. I was stubbornly trying to deal with all of this on my own the other day. When a dear friend told me to go read the Bible and spend some time. In my head, I was like "CRAP, I don't want to read my Bible." I gave up though because I knew it was the right thing to do. 1 Peter 5:7 - "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." Bek, Surrender your anxieties to me because I care.
Another example of my stubbornness was last night. I was over in the Wheaton College area with Jacob. We were going to go up to a friend's apartment to watch a movie but two flights of stairs stood in my way. Even though there was probably 5 or 6 strong men around to life me up these stairs, I decided to crawl. Jacob reassured me over and over that I should let them carry me up but I continued in my ways and told him that I would rather crawl then fall.
If I have an opinion over something, I am stubborn to maintain that I am right. In the second grade, I was learning about the body and its systems. I learned the sternum protects the heart and rib area. I told this fact to my older brother Tim who made the claim that I wasn't right. I fought with him and found a credible source who backed up my argument. I still celebrate this victory.
This stubbornness sometimes has the problem of getting me in trouble, making me eat some humble pie, and even reevaluate my choices. The stubbornness that I have is because I want to maintain control of my life. I am stubborn that I think know what is best for me rather than giving control to God.
Surrender your life. This is not an easy task to do when I want to be in control. I've had to do it several times but not without some kicking and screaming along the way. Surrender your strength because I need to show others that in your weaknesses, I AM stronger. Surrender your comfort because I have better things for you during this change. Surrender it all to me because I said so. Sometimes we receive answers of why God asks us to surrender. Other times we have no clue.
God is teaching me this lesson of surrendering everything to Him yet again. I was stubbornly trying to deal with all of this on my own the other day. When a dear friend told me to go read the Bible and spend some time. In my head, I was like "CRAP, I don't want to read my Bible." I gave up though because I knew it was the right thing to do. 1 Peter 5:7 - "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." Bek, Surrender your anxieties to me because I care.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Tank Chair!
What does Bek do on a snow day that is different from any other day?? Find a chair that could help me conquer snow, rain, sand, and anything else that prevents me from troking.
The tank chair is an awesome invention to help those with disabilities to enjoy the outdoors at any point of the year. Unfortunately it costs $18,500 which is about 13,000 more than I could justify paying on my own. Check out the website where they have videos, pictures, and more! http://tankchair.net/
Maybe someday I'll have the privilege of riding one of these for fun. I'm pretty sure this is what everyone wants me to have as a wheelchair. TANK CHAIR!
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Snow Troking
Many of you know that snow if probably my least favorite thing. Snow tends to make troking with much more difficult. I actually don't have anything to complain about this year. Besides this blizzard, we have had very little snow or precipitation. Right now the blizzard is making entire cities shut down, schools to close, crazy shoppers stocking up as if we're going to be stuck for the next 6 months, and an abundance of new facebook statuses. Really this blizzard doesn't overly affect my life right now since leaving the house seems to happen only in necessity or because I'm going out to visit a friend. But I have a somewhat amusing story about snow this year...
So it was the Saturday after Christmas. I had spent the morning reuniting with my church friends for breakfast. Afterwards, my dad came with Jacob and Jay to pick me up from the house. We head over to my house and spend an hour or so there. It was time to take Jacob and Jay back to their apartment. I put on my coat and purse to head over with them. At the time, there was probably about 6 inches of snow on the ground from our white Christmas. I wheel out the side door with the guys. Jay was about to hold onto the back of my wheelchair as I was going down our slippery, wooden amp but I was to quick for him. My thought was, I'm used to doing this on my own anyways. Well instead of gradually speeding down the ramp and turning into the driveway as I was accustomed to doing, I raced down the ramp without catching my speed and go full throttle into the snow bank at the bottom of the ramp. When my front wheels hit the snow bank, I lurch face-forward into the snow. I wish this would've been recorded for hilarity and viewing for years to come, but unfortunately it was not. Jacob and Jay immediately come to see if I was alright but also laughing because they thought it was somewhat purposeful. I finally pick my face up out of the snow and already can feel the mascara running partly because of the wet snow and partly because of tears. My entire body was covered and wet. Jacob looked at me and asked if I still wanted to go with them. My already shivering body answered no. I needed time to warm up and dry off. They helped me into my chair as I had been launched forward unable to save myself in anyway. I got inside laughing and shivering at the turn of events. Instead of driving out that day, I gave Jacob a chilly hug and stayed home.
It didn't take long for my body to recover and for me to laugh about what happened. Blizzard or not, snow is not my friend. I often tell people, "If snow fell in a way that it was never on sidewalks, streets, or driveways, I would love this time of year." Unfortunately it tends to snow all over rather than in a pattern to my own liking.
So it was the Saturday after Christmas. I had spent the morning reuniting with my church friends for breakfast. Afterwards, my dad came with Jacob and Jay to pick me up from the house. We head over to my house and spend an hour or so there. It was time to take Jacob and Jay back to their apartment. I put on my coat and purse to head over with them. At the time, there was probably about 6 inches of snow on the ground from our white Christmas. I wheel out the side door with the guys. Jay was about to hold onto the back of my wheelchair as I was going down our slippery, wooden amp but I was to quick for him. My thought was, I'm used to doing this on my own anyways. Well instead of gradually speeding down the ramp and turning into the driveway as I was accustomed to doing, I raced down the ramp without catching my speed and go full throttle into the snow bank at the bottom of the ramp. When my front wheels hit the snow bank, I lurch face-forward into the snow. I wish this would've been recorded for hilarity and viewing for years to come, but unfortunately it was not. Jacob and Jay immediately come to see if I was alright but also laughing because they thought it was somewhat purposeful. I finally pick my face up out of the snow and already can feel the mascara running partly because of the wet snow and partly because of tears. My entire body was covered and wet. Jacob looked at me and asked if I still wanted to go with them. My already shivering body answered no. I needed time to warm up and dry off. They helped me into my chair as I had been launched forward unable to save myself in anyway. I got inside laughing and shivering at the turn of events. Instead of driving out that day, I gave Jacob a chilly hug and stayed home.
It didn't take long for my body to recover and for me to laugh about what happened. Blizzard or not, snow is not my friend. I often tell people, "If snow fell in a way that it was never on sidewalks, streets, or driveways, I would love this time of year." Unfortunately it tends to snow all over rather than in a pattern to my own liking.
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